How to Usher in Spring

If you’ve had enough of Winter and recently started to sense “that certain something” in the air indicating Spring, then act now by following some, or all of the following pre-Spring rituals so Mother Nature will get the damn show on the road.

• Store all fur (faux and real coats, fur-lined sweaters, jackets, fur hats, furbees)
• Start thinking about how you plan to break-up with your boots for ½ a year. “God, I am so going to miss you too! I promise even if the pirate look is passé next fall, I will wear you with my jeans tucked in so everyone will still know we’re together.”
• Drink a white wine spritzer, or other warm-weather-beverage while it’s still daylight. (have you noticed? The days are longer, so can do this right after work. Or what the hell, have one at noon, it’s Spring!)
• Paint toenails. Use a cool new color, like these from OPI’s Spring 2008 India collection. (ooh, I like the Black Cherry Chutney. Black Cherry Chutney, Black Cherry Chutney - that’s fun to say.)
• Embark on major body hair removal campaign. (I know Julia Roberts does, but I don’t feel super-celebrity-fabulous when mine look like this)
  
  
• Put “tickets on the fridge.” Plan something new to look forward to like a trip to Mexico, a pre-Spring weekend drive. Go skiing with white zinc on your nose and fewer layers. Test a list of sports bars to find perfect headquarters for March Madness.
• Do many, many sit ups so your abs are sore, thus focusing your attention on them for an entire day, which will make you think about swimwear.
• Do many, many more sit ups in preparation for when you are forced to shop for swimwear.
• Start seeing how long you can go with out food while pretending like you’re in a hot desert. (this is silly, I’m fixating on fear of previous bullet)
• Get your car washed inside and out
• Buy Popsicles (I like Pace's Dairy Ann Popsicles)
• Buy new sunglasses
• Listen to Bananarama’s “Cruel Summer”
  

What am I missing?